if you like me you must not know who I am
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
