My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I need to align my fucking chakras
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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