He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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