I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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