Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
