I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
