You just made me feel so damn special
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
