I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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