sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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