Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
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