Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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