i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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