Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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