He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Holy sore nipples Batman
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
