My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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