You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize