Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Sorry about my life...
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
