dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize