Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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