There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
