Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
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