my sisters under your porch take her home
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
