Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
