well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I will be naked everywhere
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
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