...so i touched it.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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