So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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