I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
We are two peas in an std pod
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize