I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
