I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
