Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Shame is for Republicans.
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