It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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