porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
