Its about making memories worth repressing
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
