I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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