No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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