No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
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