he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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