there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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