as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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