I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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