Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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