so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
