VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
