Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
