i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
