if you like me you must not know who I am
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
