New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Randomize
