Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
