Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
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