Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
